Sunday, April 8, 2007

Freedom and Irresponsibility

Some people say men have become less chauvenistic. Younger men are supposed to be less chauvenistic than their fathers were and respect women more. I'm not sure this is quite true. But I think it's fair to say they have become less responsible.

If there is any woman out there who thinks she's enjoying women's liberation through sexual freedom, I think she's got to be kidding herself. True, perhaps they can't lock you up anymore in some Irish Catholic laundromat for having extra-martial sex anymore, but on the whole I personally believe that men have exploited this new freedom very well. Think about it. The slaves that were brought to America were free before they were kidnapped and sold into slavery too. Freedom is something that can be taken away. It doesn't mean that once you have it, you have it forever.

Typically men these days want to have sex with no commitment of any kind. To be fair they were probably always like this but there were certain social pressures in place that attempted to prevent them for doing so. And we aren't even talking about marriage or co-habitation here. Men these days don't even want to go 'steady' anymore because well, it's just too much commitment. Even women are getting this way. A fifteen year old Spanish girl told me that the average time span for going steady is 2 weeks now. Yeah, right.

So boys and men are going around having sex indiscriminately with anyone they want at any time they want. Girls see this and do the same. After all, they're equal right, so why not? Many of them don't even stop to think that they can get pregnant and boys can't.

"I'll just get an abortion."
"I'm on the pill."
"I'll take the morning after drug."
"I have an IUD."

Well, the ones that do think about pregnancies often don't think about STDs and now STDs have reached epidemic proportions in some cities such as....London. So the diseases just spread and spread.

For those that are sexually liberated but don't want to get diseases the only, the only option begins to be total abstinence because everyone is infected with something. Just great.

Anyway to get back on track. Here are some statements guys make to convince women to have sex with them with absolutely no commitment (and we're talking about not even talking to them the next day in some cases) :

"Sex is part of getting to know you." (English Male, 40)

"But you're a liberated woman and I'm single and you're single, so why not?" (Spanish Male, 26)

"It's OK to do this in America." (American Male, 22)

In a way if women are silly enough to fall for these insipid statements, they have only themselves to blame. Problem is they usually have this nice support group of peers who are also women who kind of pressure them into thinking they aren't cool if they're not having sex. Peer pressure is a real bitch for younger people really. And with the whole of society kind of pressuring women to pair off with men or just simply have a lot of sex, what do you expect from them?

It's all about making use of your 'freedom' responsibly really...not because it's the right thing to do but because all the crap comes back to you in the end. And it really does.

I know some older guys who are in their late 30s to early 40s going totally nuts because their cleaning lady got sick of them and left them. One of them even tried to con me into cleaning his place in exchange for using his Internet.

I said: Absolutely not.

I went to a cyber cafe instead and paid them to let me use their Internet, hence helping drive the economy instead of getting exploited by some irresponsible male.

Well, it's a liberated world right? So who are they going to ask really until they find their next cleaning lady. If they have mothers that still dote on them (as in the case of the Spanish), well, she's not going to live forever.

It's going to be a great world. We'll have to work harder and harder to pay money to people we don't know to do stuff that partners or even friends used to help you out with. But with this new sense of freedom and irresponsibility, we often find that we neither have partners nor friends who will lift a finger to help anymore....often because they are too busy working over time to pay strangers to do that work for them too.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Absolutely ! Being a mom of girls it drives me to the brink of paranoiah, I worry so much of what the world will be when they are young women, and what the 'norm' of their times will bring. I also agree with you on the effects of peer pressure and what it means to be cool. I can't stand the whole 'sex and the city attitude'. Although I sometimes watch the show for laughs, the life style portrayed is sort of dispicable in my books, in that, I find it to be such an unfullfilling choice, to just have pointless one night stands. Also what happened to dignity? is it possible for a woman to live life that way and 'not feel used?', it's sad but true...woman have a 'raw deal'... but we would be fools to think we have the same attributes as men... life just does'nt work that way.